oh my god

please, please listen to all of these. just close your eyes for a while, this is what music was meant to be. i could die








this guy subscribed to me on youtube i have no idea why he is the #12 most subscribed to person in australia or something and has almost 50,000 subscribers haha but i think he subs to a lot of people who are mediocre but passionate players, which is really nice i think. instrumental music, instrumental guitar is so so beautiful, it is so powerful and there are no words. it is so unlike anything else and i love it. i haven't listened to new music in soo long and i don't even really have a music taste anymore. i do still really like punkish stuff and indie stuff and whatever but really i just don't listen to anything at all. but it's weird because i have just been so drawn to lute music, instrumental guitar, saloon music, big band/swing, piano, etc, blah, balbhablah, whatever. i like this change a lot. lyrics have become so trite.

i hear hannah singing in the shower and it makes me happy yay

alflskdflafj

i am so easily fixed, but still so easily broken.
god, i just want to stay where you are. i just need encouragement, i need you, i need your love and your peace and your wisdom. i don't know what i am supposed to want, what direction to head towards.
and i don't know if i should override into this comm arts drawing classs auahaghghgh like 6 hours of drawing homework poo poo. should i try to believe that i'm going to use all of my free time wisely or should i make myself as busy as possible? i don't know if i will like completely fall apart either way auaghasdhfa;sdfasdlfadsfasldfl;ahsglaksdhlfasdfasldhfags. i don't know.

i want my mommy, i want my daddy, i want my brothers, i want my pillow and my bed and my comfort and my happiness and my ignorance and i hate it. why is it so easy to be so stupid?

i just want to come home to someone who is happy to see me :/